Chapter 89 : Hopeless Love

I know my last post was pretty unexpected but a lot has happened since my last post and I don't really want to talk about it anymore. (more like I'm tired to even talk about it) But since the last post was on the topic of love, I just thought I'd expand a little more on the topic.

As much as I hate to admit it, I'm a hopeless romantic. I love the idea of being in love and everything related to love.

Don't you just hate it when you see your friends in love and you're just there, yeah, just you, alone. That sucky feeling that you know someone in your life is missing and you just wish that person could be here with you right now, pronto. Or that feeling you get when you watch romantic movies and the male and female lead just seem so happy to be with each other, yeah I'm sure you'll say it's just onscreen romance and they're not dating in real life but I guess I'm just sucked into this idea of love, so much so that everything related to it just seem so real. Don't get me wrong though, I'm not some crazy lover, stalker or creep, nothing of that sort.

Is there a way to stop being a hopeless romantic?

I guess the only way is to just do everything and think about anything that's not related to love. It's not that I'm saying "No" to love but I guess I just need to get out of the game (not that I have any game in the first place) and focus on myself (not the self-obsessed kind) and realise the things that I want to really do before I decide to be committed since this isn't working out for me at all. It's just kind of funny how things change over the years, just 4 years ago, I made a blog post in my previous blogging saying that- 

"I don't feel the need to get into a relationship yet? Or maybe they just aren't my match? Although I may have said that I won't get a girlfriend until I'm like 17 or 18, I guess I might stick to it afterall." -Marcus Khoo, 2010

 And now I'm 18 turning 19, feeling the need to get into a relationship but nothing's happened, guess I'm just trapped in this twisted circle. I guess it's time to really focus on myself before I can make time for someone else, I just got to realise that it's not my time yet, not now and probably not anytime soon :/